Create Yourself

I would have to say that one of the worst parts of being unemployed and living alone is the loneliness factor.  I miss being around people everyday in a work environment and being able to interact with colleagues.  I try to get out of the house everyday, but I also don't want to spend money.  It is quite the double-edged sword.


Maybe I should try to get out of the house and volunteer.  That would be a good way for me to interact with people.


I wish I could figure out what path to take in life.  I would really like to find a job that I love, but I'm not quite sure what that would be.  I often think about going back to school, but I'm not sure what I would go back for.  If only things were easier!

Is Honesty the Best Policy?

Harrison and Marisah are at the perfect age for them to be completely honest about what happens in their life.  I enjoy that they can be so open with me about their friends, what happens at school, who they like and who they don't.  I like that they trust me feel as if they can speak freely.


Joseph and Hailee on the other hand, I'm not so sure I want them to be completely honest.  I have always had the same relationship with Joseph and Hailee as I have with Marisah and Harrison, but they are at a rough age and have been through a lot.  I do like that they trust me, but sometimes the information I receive is not what I want to hear.  I know they are doing what a lot of teenagers do as far as drinking and experimenting, but what do I do with the information they give me?  I feel as if I tell the people who are supposed to care, they won't.  I'm sure their parents know what they are doing, but they don't do anything about it.


It's such a tough position for me to be in.  I desperately want to help them and try to get them on the right track in life, but I don't know how.

I'm Wiped!

It feels like I haven't blogged in forever, even though it has only been a day or two.  I picked the kids up from school yesterday and have been going nonstop since!  I love them to death, but boy am I exhausted!  Yesterday was kind of a chill day since it had been a little rainy, but by mid-afternoon the sun decided to come out and we just walked around my apartment building for awhile and then saw my neighbor feeding some deer. Harrison of course wanted to go touch the deer, but Rissy told him that they kick people in the shins!  I seriously don't know where kids come up with these things, but I wish I had written some of the things down that has come out of their mouths.  My all time favorite- which I don't think I will ever forget- is when Marisah was 3 or 4 and she had put her hands on my boobs and asked me what they were.  I had told her they were my breasts and she then asked if hers were going to be as big as mine when she got older!  Harrison is ever the curious one and is trying to find out all about the world and where everyone fits.  A couple of weeks ago he had asked me if I was his other mother.  I guess they had friends who had stepmothers, and he thought everyone had two moms.  When I told him I wasn't, he then asked me if I was his fairy Godmother!  I said yes to that one, haha!


Today was a long day.  I didn't get much sleep last night because Marisah was extremely restless.  I had fallen asleep on the couch but I heard her in my room moaning loudly.  She looked to have had a nightmare so I rubbed her legs a bit and then tried to go back to sleep on the couch.  A bit later I heard her again!  Finally I decided to sleep in bed with the two of them and I was literally sleeping with one cheek off the bed the entire night.  Not to mention I got kicked in the shins, elbowed in the jaw and a smack on my butt.  She is a pretty violent sleeper, but last night she had something not-so-normal going on.


Harrison is the epitome of stubborn.  The kid doesn't like to try new foods so as soon as dinner started I told him that he had to try the potatoes on his plate.  They were au gratin potatoes so I knew he would like them.  He tried to fill up on his chicken and broccoli but I kept reminding him that he couldn't leave the table until he tried the potatoes.  Two hours later he was still sitting there.  So then I gave him the option of bed or eating the potatoes.  The little monster chose bed.  I went into my room and was trying to reason with him that he was really choosing bed over taking one little bit of potatoes?!  I told him it was his decision and no one else's, but I felt as if he was making a bad decision.  After a little reasoning and rational thinking on his part I finally got him to eat the damn potatoes. He kept trying to bargain with me throughout dinner but I held my ground.  I can be just as stubborn as he is!!


After all was said and done we played some Connect 4 and Trouble and they are now snoring away after begging for some back rubs.  Personally I wish I had gotten the back rub because at 70 lbs, Marisah thinks she can still be carried around like Harrison who weighs about half that!  I love their love so much though, its hard to say no!

Show Me The Money

The other day I was looking up my credit card account.  I had recently paid it off but I knew I was supposed to receive a credit from 1-800-Contacts for returning contacts that I could no longer use.  Upon checking my account, I had a $310 credit.  The credit card company was going to hold this as a credit!  I called up the company and told them I wanted my money in check form.  They obliged, but had I not called, they would have just held my money.  I encourage people to keep a close eye on this.  No one wants to give a customer their money back, even if it is their money.  In fact, when I first called up the company they kept asking if I was sure I wanted a check because of residual finance charges.  My account had been at $0 for two months now, how would I have incurred additional finance charges?


Moral of the story, make sure you keep a close eye on all your accounts.  You could be missing out on money in your pocket because the bigger corporations aren't willing to part with it.  

Forget Sticks and Stones, Words Can Hurt

Some people may not know that I have two openly gay cousins.  Does it bother me? Absolutely not.  Do I still love them the same as ever? Absolutely.  


I don't know if it is because I have two gay family members that I am overly sensitive to such words as faggot, fag, queer, dyke or phrases such as that's gay to describe something or a situation that is no so desirable.  I cringe when I hear these said out loud and in public.  


Actually now that I think about it, it's not just about words such as those.  I also feel the same way about the word retarded and the word n*gger.  I don't know how these words can slide off of people's tongues so easily.  I used to work with a woman who had a son who was developmentally delayed and every time someone else would use the word retarded  in her presence I would cringe. It wasn't just in her presence that made me cringe, it was at any point, but it was especially more cringe-worthy knowing about her son's condition.


I cannot even bring myself to say these words when I am repeating or quoting someone.  Words can be hurtful and one never knows who is in their presence before the word comes out of their mouth.  I know there are some people who are gay, or who do have special needs, and these words don't bother them, but they do bother me.  I have had people say the word faggot in my previous work environment and every time it was said, the people would apologize to me.  I would rather you not say the word at all, then to apologize to me.  Instead of apologies, speak kinder.  You never know who you will offend with these words!

Book Review

I have always been a fan of Jodi Picoult as a writer.  It started when I read My Sister's Keeper back when I was in college.  I was home on summer break and I remember sitting in my living room, staying up until late to finish the book.  Once I finished it, I had an ugly cry.  I had tears and snot dripping down my face.  From that moment I was hooked on Jodi.  I have read many more of her books.  I have a large collection in my library, but on Monday while going through them I discovered I had a couple that I had yet to read.  One was Handle With Care  and the other Change of Heart.  I had decided to read Handle With Care.


Handle With Care is about a young girl who has what most may know as brittle bone disease.  By the time she was five years old, she had somewhere around 58 broken bones.  While on a family vacation, Willow (the young girl) had fallen at Disney World and had broken her two femurs.  Because they were in a different state, the doctors were curious about all the breaks and ended up contacting DCS and placing Willow and her older sister Amelia in protective care.  After the situation eventually got sorted out, the family returned home and contacted a lawyer to see if they could sue Disney, the local police department as well as DCS.  The lawyers said they had no case, but upon further investigation of their case, the lawyers concluded that they did have a case for a wrongful birth suit against the obstetrician.  The obstetrician turned out to be the mother's best friend.  The book chronicles how friendships and families are torn apart and how the disease effects the older sister.  It also follows the lawyer's back story of her adoption and how the case of wrongful birth effected her own life.


I would say all in all the book was a good, fast read.  I had started it Monday afternoon and was finished by Tuesday early evening.  The problem for me that after thinking about it further, the book almost mimicked My Sister's Keeper.  There was a young sibling who had health problems and an older sibling who was rebelling against the world in order to cope with being pushed aside all the time.  There was also a lawyer who had their own issues as a back story that would end up effecting their stance on the case.  Furthermore, without giving too much away, the ending of Handle With Care had an ending that I felt was uncalled for.


Like I said, I have always loved Jodi Picoult books, but she really needs to work on her endings.  A lot of times I feel empty and disappointed after completing the book, which after reading such a great story, is a big let down.  Overall, I would recommend the book, just don't be surprised when you too are disappointed after reading the last chapter.

What a Weekend

I took the weekend off from blogging because it was a long one!  Saturday I up around 3:30 am because I heard a noise outside my window and I couldn't fall back asleep.  I had to be up at 5 am anyway, to get down to Hershey Park by 8 am, so I just laid in bed wishing for that extra hour of sleep.  Finally around 4:30 I thought it pointless to try to get any sleep so I got up and began to get ready.  Once down in Hershey Park I did the Arthritis Walk for my cousin Mollie who was diagnosed with Arthritis as a teenager.  She has been doing a lot of get herself in shape for the walk, so it was nice to be able to do it with her.  There were two different courses, a one mile walk and three mile walk.  We did the three mile, but after a half an hour of us walking around Hershey Park an attendant told us we were done.  There is no way that we walked three miles in a half an hour.  Especially with a bathroom break and our casual pace.  It was apparently opening day of the park so perhaps they just wanted to make sure everyone was out of the park before it opened.  After that we went over to Hershey world for the chocolate ride and I got a milkshake for breakfast...yum!


After the walk we got a quick bite for breakfast at a bagel place (let me tell you, PA has nothing on Jersey when it comes to bagels) and then we went back to the house.  I took a nap while others were setting up for Mollie's graduation party.  It was a nice party!  I was happy I was able to make it down for the day!  We didn't get home until about 11 o'clock and I came right home and hit my bed hard!


Yesterday was more of a relaxation day.  I didn't have much to do but because it was beautiful, I had wanted to get out of the house.  I ended up going to Target for 5 mins and then decided to come home and take my beach chair outside to read.  It was the perfect day for it!  I didn't spend too much time out there because I did not want to get sunburned.  I ended up coming back inside after about an hour and took a three hour nap.  I seem to be napping a lot lately.  Even today I took a two hour nap and feel like I could go back to sleep now.  Maybe I should see a Dr. about that, but seeing as how I refuse to pay $544 for COBRA, I have to look into other insurance possibilities.  I checked online the other day and found something for $320 that seemed to be good, so I just have to look into it a little bit more.


Not too much else going on here.  The job I had interviewed for still hasn't called me, even after I called last week to follow up.  It would nice to receive a phone call either way!

Love Love Love

Today is the perfect spring day!  72 degrees, the sun is shining, my windows are open and the birds are chirping.  I love this time of year.  I already went to the park for a walk and hope to take another one later.

When I got back from my walk it was already 2 o'clock.  I have no idea where all the time goes!  I woke up around 8:30, had some breakfast, watched one episode of Tabatha Takes Over and then went for my walk.  After I got home I received a call from Target saying my prescriptions were ready so I ran over there to pick them up.  I somehow manage to keep myself busy while not working.  I don't know what I do but the days seem to fly by.

Next week should be fun because Devon needs me to watch Presley a couple of days and I am hopefully going to pick the kids up for the weekend.

As for this weekend, I am going to PA to celebrate Mollie's graduation and Patrick's birthday!  Oddly enough I have never been to their house so I am excited to go!  In the morning we are doing a charity walk for Arthritis and then it's party time! Woohoo!

Finally!

I realized I hadn't blogged today and now that I am stuck inside I figured now is as good a time as any.  The reason I am stuck inside is because the buffoon upstairs is finally moving out!  Yay!  Currently there is a landscaping truck blocking my exit, but if it means this guy is leaving I will take it.  I personally think its kind of gross that he is loading his stuff into a landscaping truck but whatever.  Clearly after everything I've been through with him, he is not the brightest star in the sky!


I'm glad I was able to get out this morning and take a nice walk around Horseshoe Lake.  I was so happy when I woke up and saw that the sun was shining and I was out early enough that it was still kind of brisk!  There aren't many people there during the day, which I like because I'm not trying to pass people every 5 seconds.  I'm glad that I moved to where I am, and that I am able to go to the lake quite frequently to take walks.  It definitely does the body and mind some good to get out and get some fresh air along with exercise.  I can tell that the exercise is working because my clothes feel like they fit better and my tummy looks like its getting a little smaller.  Along with the walking I try to do some crunches and push ups and stuff to try to tone a little bit.  I had been doing Jillian Michaels for a bit but haven't done it in awhile.  I really should get back on track with that.  The problem is that it gets super hot in my apartment at night and I don't want to have to turn the A/C on yet.  I know, lame excuse!


That's the other thing, I don't get why my apartment gets so hot at night.  I have the windows open all day and during the day it is comfortable but at night for some reason the temperature in my living room gets up to 77 degrees.  My bedroom stays cooler.  I wonder if it has to do with the fact that management still hasn't killed the wasps' nest in my kitchen window so I haven't been able to open that.  I think if I could open that up I would get a nice cross breeze and also it wouldn't be one window trying to cool down the whole place.

Ok, I think I am done rambling for now!  I am going to try to get out of here so I can go food shopping.  I've been saying I've been going for the last week and I haven't yet made it.  I can easily spend money on clothes and purses but as far as buying food goes, I hate it!

That Was An Experience!

I had a great day with my kiddos yesterday.  I picked up Marisah and Harrison from school with balloons in hand.  Luckily the rain cleared up for a little bit!  After picking the kids up from school, Tara wanted me to distract them for an hour or so, so I ended up taking them to the dollar store and they were each able to pick out 3 things.  Talk about big decisions.  It took an hour for them to make up their minds and even once we got in the car, Harrison was already second guessing his decision.  I told him all decisions are final!  He ended up being satisfied with everything.


After we got back to the house we ordered some fried chicken for dinner (Rissy's favorite) and hung out for a big.  I was also able to chat with Joseph and Hailee for a bit and see what was going on in their lives.  After dinner and cake, Joseph wanted a ride to Quick Chek and Hailee tagged along.  On the way there, they asked if I would take them to an empty parking lot where they could learn how to drive.  I reluctantly agreed.  Hailee was up first and she was a little apprehensive with the gas pedal, which was fine with me.  She was super aware of everything around and managed to park in a parking spot all on her own.  Joseph on the other hand was a little out of control.  I feel like he felt it was one of his video games.  He was heavy on the gas and was turning way too fast and way too hard.  No matter how many times I told him to lightly touch the gas, it didn't work.  And then after pushing the gas down hard, he would then slam on the brakes.  I about had a panic attack.  When he went up on the curb, that was the final straw.  I thought he had bent my rim but I went to STS today and they said it was just the hubcap and they were able to fix it!  I can't imagine what parents go through trying to teach their kids to drive.  I would say Joseph is a little too immature to get his license, but Hailee would be okay.

He needs a haircut!

They weren't actually driving while I
took the picture.  Safety first!

After all was said and done it was getting late and I was exhausted.  I tried to get in my car 3 times but each time Harrison would stand on the porch yelling for me to come back.  He wanted to know if he could come live with me.  Then all four kids came out and were fighting over who got the last kiss goodbye.  Joseph and Hailee were on each cheek, Rissy was kissing my lips and Harrison was fighting to get a spot.  Joseph and Hailee ended up giving up and then it was between Rissy and Harry.  I kept telling them to get inside because it was late and even after all the hugs and kisses they were still throwing me air hugs and kisses!  It is hard to be so loved!



By the way, as Rissy was doing her jumping kisses last night, she is almost tall enough to kiss me without the jumping.  Why do they keep growing????

Make a wish!!

Happy Birthday Marisah Grace!

One of the best days of my life was the day that this sweet, beautiful, brilliant little girl was born.  I will never forget receiving the phone call that I had a new baby cousin.  It was after a long day of being at Beer Olympics and I was exhausted and annoyed at the same time.  My sister had called super excited that this angel came to join us and I didn't react as I should have.  I was too busy dealing with someone else who had a little too much fun at Beer Olympics.  I did call my sister back and arranged to drive home the following day to meet this precious baby!

Being such a big part of Marisah's life has been one of the greatest experiences.  She provides me with unconditional love, tells me I'm beautiful and is the best cuddle bug.  When I am around her, it's like there are no other seats in the room and she is on top of me 24/7.  Now that she is getting bigger it is a little more difficult but I could never throw this girl off my lap and always have to pick her up when she asks.  Whenever I have to leave her, it is heartbreaking and the goodbye process is just that, a process.  I can't even tell how many kisses and hugs are exchanged between the two of us and how many "I love yous" are said.  We even have a special kiss where she holds my hands and I lift into the air and she tries to kiss me while she is jumping.  We have been doing this for years and now that she is 8, she pretty much does not need to jump to reach my lips!

I cannot explain the amount of love I have for Marisah and Harrison.  They are a big part of my life and I couldn't have asked for anything better.  I feel as if we have a special bond that not many people can understand.  It is amazing to be such a big part of a child's life.  All the late nights, all the dirty diapers, all the feedings, all the fussing, is all worth is when you look at a happy baby!  It is hard to believe that Rissy and Harry are not babies anymore. It boggles my mind how quickly they have grown up. One of my favorite stories of Marisah is me telling her on her 4th birthday that she wasn't allowed to grow up anymore.  She was then heard asking God to keep her little forever. Normally it was her singing "Living On A Prayer" before bedtime.

Today I am going to go surprise her at school with some birthday balloons!  I can't wait to squeeze her and wish her the happiest of birthdays!

huh?

The guy that lives above me was supposed to be evicted by April 30th.  He is still living upstairs 2 weeks later. I don't understand how that happened.  He has been nothing but a problem since he has moved in and has had the cops on him at least a half a dozen times.  I have spoken to management and they say he now needs to go to court and get in front of the judge.  I just wonder how much longer I have to deal with it.


At this point I just think he is being spiteful with the stomping around.  He literally shakes my entire apartment when he moves around, to the point where my living pictures have to be straightened out all the time.


I've even been told that he hasn't been paying his rent.  How do people get away with these things and not have any consequences?  Why are the good tenants continually having to put up with this ass while he can keep blasting his music, keeping the entire building awake and making his whereabouts in his apartment known to everyone in the building?


I hope he is out soon before I lose my mind or before the lady next door to me strangles him like she says she will!

Happy Mother's Day!

No blog from me yesterday because I was attending a baby shower for my college roommate!  What a perfect way to celebrate Mother's Day weekend for her!


I would like to say a very special Happy Mother's day to my mommy!  I wish I lived closer to her so that I could spend the day with her.  It's hard being away from her all the time, but I do talk to her on the phone pretty much everyday.  She is always there to listen to me and offer up some advice.  I don't know what I would do without her.  It makes me cry as I write this to think about not having her around.  She has had a rough couple of years health wise but thank God everything is okay now.


Living away from my parents I often have panic attacks that something will happen to them.  I know it is kind of an irrational thing, but I seriously don't know how I would survive if I lost them.  I have dreams that they have gotten into a car accident or suffered a heart attack and I wake up in a panic.


But enough with depressing things!  I still feel like a kid when I am with my mother.  When I went down there in March I still cuddled with her on the couch as if I were a four year old.  I just found a picture of my mother carrying me around when I was about 4 or 5 and I had the biggest smile on my face.  My mother looked like she was in a bit of pain carrying me around, but I couldn't look happier!  Sometimes I wish she could still carry me around!  


Happy Mother's day Mom!  I love you so much and don't know what I would ever do without you!  I hope you have a great day and hopefully I will be down there soon to sit on the beach and hang out!

I Am Me

I'm not a fan of people telling me what to do and how I should be living my life.  I am my own person and I will do what I want.  Whether you agree with it or not is not my problem, it is yours.


I try not to hold grudges because it's a waste of time and energy.  I have done it before and it can be all consuming.  It is not worth it anymore!



Anyway, I'm off to have a wonderful weekend with some great friends!  I'm excited to be a part of many special occasions with the people I love!

Am I A Creeper?

It's no secret that I love kids!  When I worked at Hallmark, forget talking to the adults, I always talked to the kids.  I loved working Halloween and giving out candy to all the little princesses and Spidermen.  One of my co-workers told me that I was one of those people who should have 12 kids!


Yesterday I was at Target and it must have been prime time for stay-at-home moms because there were a dozen cute babies!!  Am I a creeper because I always smile and talk to the babies?  Some mothers look at me like I'm a crazy lady who will kidnap their child.  When I've been out with Marisah and Harrison and someone wanted to talk to them, I didn't pull them away or act nasty to the person.  If anything, I would be friendly to the individual to let them know I have an eye on the kids.


I guess it all goes back to my original post.  Does this world live in too much fear that no one wants to be nice to anyone anymore?

Fashion Forward

I must say one of the perks of being unemployed is being able to wear sweats everyday.  My fashion sense has two different extremes.  I'm either in a dress or in sweats.  There usually is no in between.  I am not a fan of jeans so I tend to wear things that are comfortable.  People often wonder why I find dresses so comfortable...because they are not binding.  It's so easy to just throw on a dress and go.  You don't have to worry about finding a matching outfit and you don't have to worry about a waistband digging into your tummy!


I do kind of miss getting dressed everyday, so occasionally I will throw on a dress to run some errands.  After all, I am still single and need to find a man ;-)

The Pits

I woke up with a pit in my stomach this morning.  I'm not sure why.  Actually I'm pretty sure it has to do with money.  I wish you didn't need money for everything in life!


I'm trying not to spend a lot of money now that I don't have a job, but it seems like every weekend from this past one until June I have something planned, and it all involves traveling.  It wouldn't be so hard if all of these events weren't so important to me.


It makes me feel even worse that between all these financial issues, my father's birthday, as well as Mother's Day, is also mixed in there.  I feel bad that I haven't had a lot of extra money to buy them gifts.  Hopefully I'll be able to get down there soon and take them out to a nice dinner.  If anyone deserves a nice gift, it would be these two!

Happy Happy

This past weekend was my cousin Erin's surprise 30th birthday.  As well as turning 30, she also got engaged!!


To say she was shocked upon entering the party was an understatement.  As soon as she saw everyone gathered, she instantly burst into tears.  Throughout the night she kept saying that she did not deserve all the hoopla and doesn't know how she ever got so lucky.  We think we are the lucky ones for having her in our lives, and Mike is the lucky one for landing such a catch!!


Every person deserves to be happy and deserve to be as lucky as her. She has a wonderful fiance who spent so much time not only organizing a surprise party, but also staging an engagement!  He was able to get all her closest friends together, as well as family.


Welcome to the family Mike!! 


Eri, you deserve all the happiness in the world!!  Congrats again, I love you sooo much!



Even through the tears, she is gorgeous!  I can't wait to start planning the wedding and going dress shopping in the city!!!

Happy Birthday Dad!!

Happy birthday to the best dad in the world! 

My dad may be the strong silent type, but I couldn't have asked for a better father.  I know that no matter what happens he will always be there for me! The best times of my life growing up were the days that he coached my soccer team.  I still pass soccer fields on the weekends and see all the kids and parents out there and wish that I could go back to those days.  How much patience must a man have to coach a bunch of pre-pubescent and teenage girls?  But he never complained!  I hope that one day I can marry a man like him!

My dad had some "quirks" when we were growing up that make me laugh now.  People think it was child abuse that my sister and I were not allowed to dunk our cookies in our milk.  We had to bite the cookie and then drink the milk; otherwise, it made too much of a mess!  Even nowadays, don't ever think of touching the walls in the house or not using the handles to open and close cabinets!  It's even fun to move things around the house and see how quickly he notices!  I shouldn't talk too much because I inherited some of those quirks!

My father is not a big phone talker so anytime I call him his most frequent line is "what else?"  So because I don't often get to say it to him, I'm putting it out in the universe that I wouldn't change anything about my childhood!  My father is the best father around and I couldn't have asked for anyone different.  Love you daddy!!

Notice how much more gray hair he has?

When one door closes...

Some people may know that I lost my job last week.  I don't see it as a bad thing, rather I look at it as a whole new beginning.  I am hoping this is the push I need to find something that I enjoy.


They say if you find a career you like you will never have to work a day in your life again.  I am hoping to find something like that!  Something where I can expand my mind and learn new things.  Something that I can be passionate about.


I have already made a bunch of contacts and even have my first interview on Monday!  Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Life Path

When I was younger I thought about my future and where I would be when I was 30.  I thought I would be married, with two kids, and living in a McMansion in the country.  I thought I would be consumed by sports practices and dance lessons.  At 30, none of these things have happened for me yet.


It's funny how you have plans for yourself but the universe has a different set of plans.  I am not unhappy with my life, it just wasn't where I thought I would be at 30.


Age is just a number though, right?  I'm not one of those people who had plans to be married by 25 and have my first kid at 27 and so on and so on.  That seems to put a lot of pressure on people.  I often wonder if that is why the divorce rate is so high.  Are people pushing to be married by a certain age and when they reach that age, they don't care who they are with, as long as it is someone?


I recently had a conversation with a friend who had those plans, but after them being together for a few years she realized her boyfriend wasn't the right one to fulfill those plans.  She ended up breaking it off, which was hard for her, but I think she made the right decision.


Moral of the story is, don't make plans for yourself.  Live your life day by day and see what the universe has planned for you. 

R E S P E C T

Going off of what I said yesterday about being kind to one another, I also feel like I need to address the top of respect.  If someone does not respect me, I do not have a reason to respect them back.  I have dealt with a lot of people in life who feel like they deserve respect when they have no idea the meaning of the word.


I once had a guy come into Hallmark and tell me straight to my face that he felt bad for me that I had to work in retail.  He felt bad for me that I was earning a living? He felt bad that I was providing for myself? Never mind the fact that I was assisting his needs!


Some people need to realize that even if a job isn't for you, there still needs to be people in this world to do it.  Don't look down on the people working at the gas station or at 7-11.  They need to earn a living and provide for their families just like me and you!

What happened to being nice?

I said last week that every time I go out in public I begin to hate humanity more and more.  I don't know if it is Jersey, if it is Morris County or if it is everywhere.  To me it seems to be in Jersey because when I go down South every one is so friendly.  I think us Northerners need to learn a thing or two from our Southern friends.


Today, while making my 10th trip to Wal-Mart this week (I know its only Wednesday), there was a guy collecting the carts in the rain.  Walking out with me was another gentleman who, after loading his bags into the car, decided to leave his cart in the middle of the road for the cart boy to collect.  I personally handed my cart to the cart boy and he was very gracious and told me to have a great night.  After getting into my car, the "gentleman" who left the cart in the middle of the road began beeping at the cart boy as he was trying to maneuver a row of carts through the parking lot.  Would it have killed this man to wait a few seconds before backing out of his parking spot?  He was in his dry car while this other man was collecting carts in the rain at Wal-Mart.  Who does he think he is?


I have always been taught to be kind to one another.  I try my hardest to smile at everyone but I'm not often met with the same response.  I understand having a bad day here and there, or maybe you don't like your job in retail, but that's not my fault.  I have worked in retail for a number of years and no matter how crappy of a day I was having, or how bad of a mood I was in, I always managed to smile and greet the customers.  In fact, often times smiling at someone else and engaging in random conversation is a great way to make yourself feel better!  Also, if you are the customer, how about smiling at that cashier who may be having a bad day?